Thursday, February 21, 2008

a million sighs and only one being heard.

Wow its end of February already..and shes already gone for about two months..and im still here waiting..sigh..i cant take this much longer..im goin insane man..waking up everyday..staring at the ceiling wishing for the day to pass faster..man..I know im being all corny and stuff..but im missing my girlfriend like hell..u know how hard it is when you know youre not gonna see your girlfriend for at least half a year? especially the one you really love with all your heart..damn..people say the pain in your heart is such a literal concept but im in real pain now..Luckily we get to keep in touch through chatting and i get to call her a couple of times..i know its hard for her too and i know shes busy..but i ll go insane if i dont talk to her..i know im being really selfish since i expect soo much from her..but i just really care u know?thats why i tend to get quite offended easily sometimes..but im glad that she feels the same way like i do..she really wants to make this relationship work too..and it will if we keep our minds to it..im applying there also and i hope i get accepted..u may think im being such a kid but im being mature than ever..this is what i want to do and nothing can stop me..ive got it all planned out so if i see any opportunity that fits i ll grab it straight away..i dont know how my parents would react to it but im standing with my decision..man..its not just that shes over there..i just want to resume my life again u know?im tired of waiting..fuck this holiday..i just want to get back on the race..


Baby, i miss u.

Wednesday, February 13, 2008

love??

i was driving a couple of days ago and i saw the weirdest thing...driving past me was a couple, middle aged and they were fighting with each other.the lady was facing the window screaming and pointing her finger at the guy's head while he sat there drove right by. It reminded me of what i saw when i was in Phuket last year; A family in front of my table consisted of a white lady who's married to an Indian guy which was sitting in front,with their son next to him. What bothered me was all of them were not looking at each other and all of them sat there not saying a single word. All of them ordered their own food, and ate quietly to themselves. Well, i thought to myself, "Aren't we at Phuket? families are supposed to be on vacation here, they're supposed to be happy..". It got me thinking alot from that image since i was missing my girl like crazy(she was in hk and here i am stranded in Phuket for a couple of days) how different people express their feelings of love towards each other.

I realized how drastically different my relationship is compared to other people. I wouldn't say that the way i handle my relationship is weird, but to me i just used common knowledge and express the way i really feel. People say that once u get into a relationship, its gonna be a tough job since its not your life anymore, its you and your partner's, so juggling between your own life and your partner's is gonna be a real hassle. Well to me, i dont find it hard being in a relationship at all, since all we do is just be honest to each other;although sometimes we do disagree upon something, but its just only another step towards understanding each other.Maybe youll think that im that corny lovey dovey type, but isnt it what we're supposed to do??i mean youre in a relationship for god's sake. U dont expect to become all manly and tough about all that shit.you got into a relationship because you felt something, that tingling feeling that strikes your heart like an arrow, and it hurts.

I dont really get why couples fight alot when theyre with each other.i mean the usual misunderstanding is obviously uncanny, but making a big deal out if it is just stupid.I mean,sometimes looking at my friends with girl problems are just so friggin weird.and when he talk about his problems, i was like "u serious??". A friend of mine got into a big fight with his girlfriend because she hugged a guy.no kissy kissies, just simply a friendly hug.im serious. I was like dude..my girl is at the states for god's sake!! and im not gonna see her for at least 6 or 7 months..and we've never been closer than ever..you guys see each other everyday..come on man..

When i love someone, i tend to love them all the way. I kept thinking ive got a big curse on me since before this no one actually appreciates the way i feel, but not until i met her. im not doing anything special, im just being me.heck, im doing every single thing that the book says. hold her hand, hug her tightly and all that stuff.and she seems to love it soo much.if it works for me, then how come it doesnt work for anyone else?if u dont hold your girl's hand, please do,if u had never hugged her,please do..because they really needed that..they really need to know how u actually feel about them.

Well, maybe my relationship isnt weird after all,its normal than ever,other people's are..hehe..i dunno..frankly i dont really care about it..all i know is that i love my baby so much and i know that she loves me alot too..hope we can stay together..and if youre in a relationship,please love your partner more..cheers

oh yea.. if its not too much..happy valentines day

Friday, February 1, 2008

Finch is baackk!!

i know this like old news but Finch is back and R2K posted videos of them recording a new song (although its just a sneek peek, but i think its gonna be kew) Im a pretty big fan of finch, i would say they have inspired me so much with they're songs and im glad that they're back together again..(a part of me kept thinkin that they're just fakin the breakup to gain more attention from the fans but..nah dont think so..) In a way, i do think that after awhile when they broke up (or in the indefinite hiatus some say) they felt like theyre in need of each other and just felt weird not being together anymore..i know how it feels when u see the same dudes every single day for a whole year, touring and shit..eventually you'll grow tired of them and felt like slapping the shit out of them the next time u see em..haha..and then after awhile they just feel so empty not being with each other hence....tadaa..finch is back..(i really wanna go see them..any sponsors??)